From the mind of Tom Beland

Creator of True Story Swear to God

Monday, May 26, 2008

INDIANA JONES AND THE TEMPLE OF A.A.R.P.


Yeeesh. I thought this movie blew.

Indiana Jones is 65 years old and he's knocking out groups of Russian soldiers half his age. The movie ground to a halt in every scene he was in. Even when he's using the whip, he looks tired.

I could see Shia surviving those three waterfalls... but every other grandparent in that boat is dead. I mean DEAD.

Two things I'd rather not see from this point on. The greedy fucker character who can't run for safety because he's too busy stuffing his fucking pockets and gets killed. And the building falling apart and everybody out-racing the disaster.

It felt old.


The days of Harrison Ford taking on brutes twice his size and absorbing twenty punches in a row are long gone. I was laughing more than cheering him during those slugfests. I just didn't buy any of it. Ugh.

Lily, however, loved it.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Yeah, thanks for that. After the movie, some friends we went with asked what I thought. I said it should be called "Indiana Jones and the...meh, who cares."

Cute monkeys teaching Indy Jr Jr to swing like tarzan, CGI enhanced swordfights, Damn you George Lucas. First Star Wars and now Indy. Take all of my childhood memories grind them into the dirt. Ugh.